I asked myself that question today. Is my family getting my best?
I lead you to assume that I am advocating perfection, I need to clear
that up. I am NOT talking about perfection. This is not a post about
being cookie-cutter little families who aren't honest about their
issues. My story I want to share is actually about a moment of
confession and humility from my child.
I rarely have an
opportunity to stay and visit with my son's preschool class, but today I
was pressured by the longing eyes of my child to stay for a little bit
of circle time. Our 5 year old has an amazing teacher at Agape who
welcomes families to stick around and see how they spend 5 days a week,
from 9-noon. She began circle time with different types of prayer to
God; things they were thankful for, things they were sorry for,
opportunities to ask for God's help. As you can imagine, the
conversations were sweet and comical. "I am thankful for being able to
stretch my fingers like this"(demonstration included.) "I am sorry for
not listening to my sister and for telling her that I only have one
sweater"(huh?) Then my child raised his hand to share. As the mother, I
shifted uncomfortably as I wondered what he might share.
proceeded to tell an "I'm sorry" prayer about something that happened
in our home last night. I will spare you the details he shared in
class, but the basis was an event of him not obeying and how truly sorry
he was for being disobedient. We had a sweet mommy/son moment and the
teacher recognized that I was touched by his confession and the fact
that he seemed truly remorseful. She proceeded to pull me aside and
tell me how he often shares things he is sorry about and also asks daily
for his class to pray for his baby brother growing in my belly. She
started cry, I started to cry, and I leaned in for another hug from my
I realized in that moment that my child's teachers and
classmates got to see a side of my son that we do not always see. Even
though it was a moment of confession, it was a good moment. They see
daily what I sometimes miss: humility, kindness, a gentle nature. Not
the world's view of a perfect son, but his character through good and
bad. Why don't I always get to see that? Why do we argue instead of
apologize? How come teachers and classmates get to see the best?
I asked myself, do I always give my best? Or do I let my guard down
with my family, because I know they will love me no matter what? In
times when I sin and hurt them, am I quick to ask forgiveness and admit
my fault? The fruits of the Spirit are love, joy, peace, patience,
kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. We
can't deny that sin creeps into family situations, but how we trust God
in the midst of it is what matters. Do we continue to pull from the
emptiness of us or do we cling to the fullness of God and all He has to
offer us. His fruit is for us.
I am proud of who my son is
becoming and the part of his character that is reflective of God's
fruit. And I am going to ask God to help me offer the best to him and
to all of my family. Our children are going to learn so much more from
our humility than from our attempt at a perfect picture.
our families HIS best today.
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
I am anticipating a re-entry to the world of personal blogging in the next few months. (yes, mom...you and the other 3 people that read this will be thrilled!) I will attempt to give comical updates to the world of the Gaskillrascals as we work our way down the path of parenthood.
One reason for my long break was a job that seems to take much of my time. I love what I get to do at Hope. It seemed like the perfect job for someone with my skills. I get to work with families, yet my scenery is constantly changing. I advocate in my church for a family ministry perspective, while working with some terrific women. I have a schedule that is flexible and I am able to be home more often than not. But life is ever-changing and this next stage is going to bring more challenges than this mom can handle. I am taking the wise advice of my friend/co-worker and blogger Nicole once said to me....when you start something new, sometimes something else has to be dropped. And for us, the entry of another rascal to our family qualifies as a reason to drop things. When we have our third boy in February, I imagine lots of things will be dropped. But those of you out there with a minor case of adult add can relate to my need to be doing lots of things. I like having many balls in the air. So, blogging will be one of those balls. Maybe we could say an outlet for my energy?
Looking forward to sharing some funny stories...better go fix breakfast, so that one of those stories is not about me being late to drop off my kids at school.