Friday, November 14, 2008

What you would do for your babies...

....anything! I know other parents would agree that mommies and daddies would give their lives for their children. The love we feel for our children is unlike any other love we have ever experienced. I love my husband with all my heart and he comes first in my life, but even he would agree that our love for our children is different. We love them, we care for them, and we hope for the best for their lives. Everyday I pray for my boys and find my self having to turn over their care to God. Even with as much as I love them, my care and protection is never as good as what God provides. I pray that they would know Jesus and find fulfillment in Christ.
All this to say my heart was overwhelmed today by a couple of things. When we went on our trip to Walmart after the Children's Museum today, we passed by a tent set up outside with men sharing how a certain organization had changed them and brought them out of drug addiction. I think it was a Christian organization based on the God bless yous that I heard while walking by one man. They asked me if I wanted to stop and hear about their group and possibly give money. I said no thank you(kindly!) as I usually do....I have good excuses:tired babies, groceries to get home, it was raining, etc. As I passed one man said something to Danny. Our firstborn was being friendly as usual and smiling at all the people. I didn't hear the full sentence, but it was something to the effect of "don't turn out like me". I thought about it all the way back to the car. What if? Danny isn't always going to make good choices and I know he will grow from mistakes, but I guess I couldn't picture him doing drugs or getting involved in crime. But we are all with sin. My heart was breaking for that man's mother. I wonder if she was like me thirty years ago. No parent wants that for their child, but fortunately in this man's case, he was using it for good. He was able to use his experiences to impact others and share Christ's love. Isn't that like our Father? He wants so much more for us.
So, then I came home and put Danny down for a nap and settled on to the couch to snuggle Josh to sleep. I had tivoed ER from last night and thought this rainy afternoon was definitely a TV watching afternoon. Forty five minutes later, I was crying and sobbing. Why do I do that? Why do I watch shows that get me emotionally involved? One of the characters had lost her son a few years ago and she was reenacting the event. I can't imagine and don't even want to think about the possibility of losing one of my boys. But I do pray that if it happened I would be strong and know that God has a plan even through the horrible stuff. How did God feel as His son hung on the cross? I find hope in His death, because it paid the price of my sins and He rose again. But the pain was real. Our sin is ugly, just like death is horrible. What a sacrifice.

I think you need some cheering up after that post, so here is a cute Gaskill family photo! I think this picture fits us...outdoors, informal, smiling Josh, independent Danny. Thanks for reading!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Everyday I thank the Lord for giving us the daughter He did. To watch how you have grown through the years in your walk with Him...it is awesome and amazing and I give Him the glory. You are a wonderful mom and wife and your love for your family is an inspiration to us all. Keep writing and sharing. I love you.

The Gaymons said...

I have those same thoughts everyday for one reason or another. They make me so thankful for Christ, they cause me to have a burst of love for Him, they make me depend on Him and His plan for us (Maggie), and they also make me scared to trust Him with my baby's life. Why? I go back and forth between complete peace in whatever happens to thinking "what if...." Thanks for sharing, Anne. So great to hear that these extreme thoughts are a part of every mommy's brain. Ash

By the way, great picture!